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Ever want to leave your desk job, throw your Blackberry in a tar pit, and buy an air ticket to settle in an....Emerging Market? I did. These are my unexpert, unsolicited, and barely coherent thoughts about life in the X-rated comic book called, Phnom Penh: The greatest city in the world. - DonBong
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8 comments:
Fire that biotch if she can't talk on the mobile as well! Or are you referring to yourself?
She'd be talking to you, so I have them turn off the phone especially on my 500 riel.
I was in the middle of my second Denny's GRAND SLAM BREAKFAST, (and what a breakfasts it was), I LOVE SCOTTSDALE!!! The phone rings. A foreign number.... think it was Cambodian.
BUT, I'd just inhaled three pancakes and two pieces of bacon. So couldn't answer the call. Plus, when a guy is in the middle of a GRAND SLAM, a far away slapper is far away. Long story short, came to find out it was NEWPORT STUD'S regular. She said she loves my triple chins and my sweaty unit, (have to take her word for it, haven't seen it for a couple of decades)... she said NEWPORT STUD ok but he not have big same me. Is it because I am charming nad have good heart? Or is it because I pay her forty for a shorty? I think I am getting a good deal. Cause 2, 3 or 4 GRAND SLAMS and I have a boner with A CAPITAL O... so always roll out of the Scottsdale Denny's lot, hang a right towards the hood and hook up with a crack hoe which costs me a FITTY. The best I get is she calls me sugar and it is over in a hurry... so I figure I'm getting good value with NEWPORT STUD'S regular with forty for a shorty... except she always has to see her mama right after. But oh well, Cali 2 has good breakfasts even if I have to order 10 of the bird sized portions.
Sincerely- Bad Bob.... ps.. stay the fuck away from where I stay!
Hey Scottsdale Slammer, I know exactly which Denny's you're talking about - the one just down the street from Desert Divas, and lookie here, your favorite slapper tops the list - http://www.phillipslaw.org/desert-diva-ring-pictures-of-the-desert-diva-prostitution-arrest-suspects/
Listen, I am quite concerned about your welfare as when you're not giving Srey Lake Mui your shorty, I have to find other sources of funds to pay for my cardinal pleasures. So I'd like to suggest you start making your nookie runs across the state line - where your actions are legal. I care enough that I have found the perfect location for you - http://www.abc15.com/news/national/story/Nev-brothel-aims-to-offer-first-male-prostitutes/kE5P4GQahk-mdlQdDnVS0w.cspx
Finally Pavlov - and Srey Lake Mui has been trying to get this through that thick GS depository of yours - when the phone rings and it's SLM, gulp down your GrandSlams - or better yet, get them packed to go and store them away in your caravan for later - and get your lard ass directly to the nearest WU and hook SLM up - your local slappers can wait, but SLM cannot. And hey dude, times are tough, SLM's mom is still sick and and as luck would have it, another fucking cow died. Add a couple of zeros to the amount and you can be sure that she'll love you even more too much.
Dear Newport Stud,
Am devastated by the tragic news that SLM's mother is sick again and another fucking cow died. Have taken out a 2nd mortgage on the trailer in the hopes that this will make it right. You can believe there are couple more zero's than usual. The cheque is in the mail addressed to "Play Card/Smoke Happy/Num Num NPS Inc."
Since you so kindly shared with me the talent available just down the street from our favorite Scottsdale Denny's... guess that makes us best friends now. I had no idea! Must be a case of not seeing the forest for the trees as the hoes I know are packing considerably more junk in the trunk. It would take 3 SLMs to balance the scale with 1 of my Scottsdale regulars. Since we are now the "BEST OF BRO'S" On my return visit to WA we can have 3way with SLM. My other best friend Leon, who lives 2 trailers down wants to come along... but I gotta warn ya... Leon has a stink to him you won't believe. But no matter, if he can get a release from his parole officer we can make it a 4way with SLM. GOOD TIMES BRO!!! Also gonna teach SLM how to say SHOOGGA... ain't nothing better than hearin', "u wanna cum up in here on my face SHOOGGA?"
....ps stay the fuck away from where I stay
Back at ya Slammer. The kind words are greatly appreciated, but even more so, deeply disturbing! I'm kind of thinking that upon your return, your ultimate desire is to have a manage-a-twat with Mista Newport, minus the twat. Bad news for you - Homey don't play dat! Me thinks the closest our swords should ever get is when rubbing the whispering eye...on separate ocassions.
Besides, sounds like you and your butt buddy Leon are doing well enough that you don't need another stud in the equation. But you might consider giving his sphincter a breather every now and then - it does wonders towards clearing his odor.
Newport Stud,
Leon... butt buddy??? Har har I about busted my gut over that one. The more I get to know you the more I know what good buddies we are gonna be. When you get to meet Ol' Leon you'll know how funny that is. Even Johnny Wad Holmes couldn't penetrate Ol' Leon's gigantic butt cheeks.... probably accounts for why he smells so bad. He might just have nuggets up in there pre-dating Ronnie Reagan's term as president.
As for crossing swords? Hell, you got no worries there either. What happens in the joint stays in the joint, if ya know what I mean! That'd be like saying the Skipper and Gilligan were rubbin' swords with each other, when everyone knows the Skipper was doing Mrs. Thurston Howell III. Who do you like more Ginger or Maryanne? I think Ginger is nothing but a big tease. That cunt!!! She is just like a go go girl I took one time in Pattaya. In the bar she was hot to trot... but when I got her back to the room I had to smack her a good one just to get the towel off her. I think Maryanne is likely a real tiger if ya know what I mean? I met an old chubby gal one time at the German Beer Garden in Bangkok, she was as homely as a mud fence and kinda shy too. But lemme tell ya, there weren't no coaxing to get that towel off a her. Kinda like your gal Srey Lake Mui.
Did she get the US dollars I sent yet? I'm a little worried about taking out the second mortgage on the trailer as they are threatening to cut off my disability benefits. But what the hell, ya only live once I always say.
Ol' Leon says howdy and says he can't wait to meet ya. Turns out his parole is gonna be finished in time to come along. We were talking about it today, and Leon figures probably the best way to do the 4-way with SLM is if me and him lay on our sides with SLM sandwiched in between and since you're such a tall drink a water you'll just have to catch as catch can.
ps Leon says the cost of the flight is gonna pretty much tap him out so he was wondering if it'd be ok if we stay at your place... to cut costs ya know... I told him since we are ALL BROS NOW... should be no inconvenience at all... after all that's what best friends do for each other... and Leon also says next time you're in Scottsdale he insists you crash at his trailer but says sleeping in his car that's parked permanently in the front yard would likely be the most comfortable on account of the stink.
Be seein' ya in... hell... less than 2 weeks now...can't wait
your BRO Bad Bob
I like Denny's
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