Launch

Friday rolled in with nothing special in-store. Biff offered a free invite to the Label 5 Whiskey Product Launch at the Naga Casino. Free whiskey and maybe some cool promo swag to take home. I hate casinos but it's bad luck to say, "No."

Naga Casino, 6pm-ish:
They told me I needed to get here at 6 for the "press event." Maybe I was the only one they told. An upstairs ballroom was decked out to the hilt. Impressive. First World quality setup. Stage, big screens, light show and fog machine - they had bands, dancers, and a 3-course meal featuring dishes all cooked with whiskey-sauce or a whiskey glaze or something like that. Damn. Hungry - but if it isn't beer-battered shrimp, keep booze out of my food. (The Khmers weren't too impressed either.)

The press event consisted of sexy model/dancers posing for photos with grinning (nervous or horny?) KH journalists and sponsors in front of a big Label 5 Whiskey sign. For whatever reason they had a few of those guys that spray paint themselves all over and stand still - "Living Statues." And mimes. Cambodian mimes. Funny shit. Watching mimes go up to Khmers, trying to clown around and get some sort of interactive response. What they got was embarrassed looks, and deliberate "Get the fuck out of here" stares from bodyguards who seemed to be all over the place. 15 mins after they'd released the mimes, you had 4 pissed-off looking Cambodian mimes hanging at the edge of the crowd trying to avoid contact with anyone.

Best mimes ever.

But really - who the fuck planned this thing? The French importers and event people (styling in $1000 suits...the only ones in suits) looked pleased. What were they looking at? Whatever. I'm not eating anything on that menu and the take-away swag looked pretty lame. Time to compensate myself with free booze. Started chasing the chicks with the drinks trays. One of the corporate people saw me and started over to make party-talk. We made eye contact, smiled at each other and then she watched me slam a whiskey on the rocks. Corporate people did a quick 180 - straight into a sulking mime - and didn't look my way the rest of the night.

By 7:30 I realized why there was so much security. They'd invited all sorts of cops, military, government guys - and their idiot nephews. They all brought goons. Well done Label 5. You got a room full of BIG SWINGING DICKS and their attitudinal security, and now you're gonna ply them with free whiskey all night?

I wanted to stay.

But 5 drinks on an empty stomach (in less than 1.5 hours.) Needed to boogie. Important to get some crash out time before Friday night (proper) begins.

But hey - good luck to anyone willing to invest in Cambodia. Maybe it'll be a hit. And hey - thanks much for the free booze and the sad-ass mimes**




*Not a whiskey expert but it tastes like Johnny Walker Red
** Best mimes ever.