The Foxy & The Damned

Staying in a lot lately. So when I hit the town the other night, I decided to mix things up a bit. Try something new. Usually it's a money-wasting disaster, but a lot seems to be happening near the river on streets 130 and 136, so I figured I'd check it out.

Happy Man Bar:
Haven't been here in a long time. Happy was still out front with the family and he still knows his customers by name - and drink. Not much had changed - fewer women working and maybe not as many stunners as before, but they made up for it in attitude. I stayed for 2 and even bought a lady drink. So far, so good.

Babylon Bar: (I think)
I heard this place was good. Turns out I was thinking about another place but whatever...It was good. Cuties left and right and the prices. Cool. The usual hostess bar $2.50/vodka. Sleek 'n Sexy parked herself on my thigh and we watched some movie in which Tim Allen turned into a dog and there was a monkey and everytime the monkey did something the girls would break up laughing and Sleek and Sexy would grab the inside of my thigh. I love that monkey. Good time but I was on a mission. 3 and out. Thumbs up on this place.

Flora Bar:
I've been hearing about this place for a while so I decided to check it out. Foxes working the place. Lots. The bartender seemed to know me from somewhere. So did the manager since she smacked me on the back every time she passed by. (Unless she just didn't like the looks of me...very possible.) I was digging the tunes and the girls were very, very on time. I heard right. Flora Bar is a win.

Boggie & Bacall:
I've been wanting to check this place out since WalkngBill and R-Cat got yelled at by the owner for showing up only on Sundays for the drink special. They called him an asshole and continue to show up only on Sundays. What the hell? It's a damn good special: All drinks are $1 - all day.

Anyway - I decided to go. It was OK. Can't argue with the name. Can't argue with the decor. Definitely can't argue with the Sunday drink special.....

BUT...

I can (and did) argue loudly with the gecko-fucking motodop that works out front. Little bastard demanded a $1 for the short ride to Sharky.* And the fucker wouldn't let up!!! Grabbed my arm and we almost had it out in front of Sharky Bar. He got 1000r and my undying hatred. As my tailor completes his voodoo doll,I think about Boggie & Bacall and...what can I say? What I remember most is that little bastard motodop. I spit on him 10,000 times!

So I probably won't bother going back because...really, this town has a hundred little bars just like this one - without the asshole motodop. I've since heard other stories about this dude and ask, Why hassle?

Sharky Bar:
Good crowd in town. 4-eyes, Plunger, Big Chef, Hawkeye, and....a Swedish Toilet Hitler.

(To be continued)

*Note: This would be 500r during the day - 1000r at night...I was even going to give him 1500r because I was loaded and in a good mood. But $? He got 1000r note and my undying enmity. Damn him to hell!!

Androo Spoon-Ur Makes Bank and Other News

Anonymous Does Cambodia:
Anonymity. It's a 2-way street. PC thug claims to write for Footprint Guidebooks (yawn). Known as Spoon-Ur, he was recently seen, according to a "long-term expat", performing oral sex on a obese Nigerian man in the bathroom of a riverfront bar. "Long-term expat" said Spoon-Ur left a stall, began spitting angrily into the sink, but then smiled and walked off counting a small stack of 500r notes.

Well,...freelancing for Footprint probably don't pay all that well. But the hell with him and his sordid antics, I'd rather talk about the weather.

Rain:

4-day lull in the rain caused some to speculate that it'd be over soon. Fuck that. I like rain. Good for the earth. Good for sleep. Good for sex. We weren't getting any - and I wasn't getting any....I decided to provoke it with a rain dance - the best one in the world: I suggested a friend wash his bike. He did. It was pouring down in no time. I slept and had sex. Life was good.

But rain is like anonymity, a double-edged sword.

Rashes:
Life was less good for an intrepid expat who wanted to get some photos of a flooded market. Dirtier than Bangladesh and when the boots came off - angry rashes where his feet used to be. Anti-bio cream fixed it up...for a week, and then it returned with a vengeance. So...the doctors were right...wading through sewage isn't good for your skin.

But at Least He Gets the Shot:

Anonymous - yet - perennially blitzed photographer demands to know why he isn't getting cover shots. It must be some backroom double dealing that's keeping him off the front page. Something to do with filthy lucre, selling orphans, or an affinity for bad grammar, he insists during a drunken rant (or was he just tweaking?)

Short answer: No man,....it's the material. You got it or you don't and sending anonymous e-mails to the editor will only make sarcastic bastards like me write shit about you. Besides, there are other things to worry about....

The Flu:
Health hazards abound. Changes in my schedule (a complete 180), the weather (it's a bit cooler), and my diet (zero nutritional value for the last 30 years) allowed me to experience something new. I got the flu twice in a month. 2 very different strains. It's been running around town fucking people up left and right, so if you are planning a visit, keep it in mind. Med-heads say: You can try getting a shot (it may help) and load up on vitamin C. While the flu sucks ass (and not the good kind of ass), it's just not that big a deal...

RIP:
Lay-Lay, one of the well known troupe of VN sisters was killed in a motorbike accident over the weekend. Not sure who was at fault but it doesn't matter. A witness said it looked like she broke her neck. We can only hope it was quick and painless. She deserved better and will be missed.

Only the good go young.

That's why we are all still here.

And you can all stop complaining - I UPDATED MY FUCKING BLOG. (More soon)

When I grow up...